Dear Carol: My dad has late stage Alzheimer's and is in a nursing home in our community where he seems to be receiving good care. Mom is with him every day. He no longer recognizes either of us, but Mom says that he is her husband and she will be there with him. I respect and understand that.
I'm married and have a full-time job and three children who are in many activities so it's not easy for me to take the time to visit my dad. He doesn't recognize me so I don't know how important my visits are anyway, but Mom thinks that it matters to Dad. I do want to see him, even though it's painful, so I feel guilty if I don't go at least once a week, but I balance the normal chaos of working and raising children along with making it a point to see Dad. Should I still visit even though he won't remember? — GT